The Darkened Corners
I miss them already. It took all of my will power not to sneak into the back yard while PC was sleeping last night and rescue them. My memories. That have been relegated to the trash bin.
And now they are gone. No way to rescue them. Trash day is on Tuesday
PC smugly comments, “My memories are larger than a cardboard box.”
Yeah? So are mine, apparently. They take up 11 cardboard boxes. Or at least they did.
Now I’m down to 5. I keep waiting for the much-hyped cathartic sensation that supposedly comes with purging. I suspect that I won’t be feeling it anytime soon.
And then he adds, “Why do you need things in order to remember? I have my memories. They don’t require things. I just remember and then the moment passes.”
Well, that might be true. But having spent the better part of three days frolicking down Memory Lane, I realize how much I enjoy having tangible mementos.
Without my things, how else can I share the story about my Bat Mitzvah cards? Yes, I can describe it. But no words can accurately capture the humour of receiving so many copies of the same card.
Apparently in 1984, there were only so many Bat Mitzvah card choices at the Hallmark store. We had invited so many people (the entire congregation!) to my Bat Mitzvah and with such limited card selections, I was bound to receive duplicates. Someone with a working knowledge of statistics might be able to better explain this but I, for one, was surprised that the duplications were not spread evenly among the six or so choices. There were two cards in particular that had dozens and dozens of matching mates. I clearly recall opening the first duplicate and being amused. And how the amusement gradually became out-and-out laughter with each subsequent copy.
Am I able to recall the story without seeing the cards? Certainly. But there is much power in the physicality of a memory. And like the Torah, we see nuances that may not have previously appeared to us. I had seen these cards a number of times. But never before had I noticed that the majority of them employed the term ‘Bas Mitzvah’ instead of ‘Bat Mitzvah.’ Perhaps it is the passage of time, as well as the fact that ‘Bat Mitzvah’ has virtually replaced the older pronunciation, that brought it to my attention. Without the physical objects, I can no longer learn from my own past in the same way.
I know that PC thinks that I am a pack rat and perhaps I do have some difficulty seeing the distinction between necessary mementos and what he lovingly calls “crap.” It’s not as though I am a compulsive hoarder. I just don’t want to let go…
Survey says…
“According to a Pew poll…”
“A recent AOL survey reports that…”
“A 2007 Gallup Poll supports…”
Did you ever stop and think — hey, who did they actually ask? They didn’t ask me. And I certainly have an opinion!
Here’s your chance:
You are invited to participate in an interesting and entertaining survey about language. Essentially, we’re asking about the spread of Yiddish (and some Hebrew) among English speakers in North America. We’re turning to both Jews and non-Jews to answer questions like these: Who uses Yiddish words like “shmooze” and “daven” and phrases like “Money, shmoney”? Why do some people say “temple” while others say “shul”? Who prefers biblical names for their babies? Your responses will help us answer these and other questions, and you might learn something about yourself in the process. Please set aside 15-20 minutes, and click on this link to participate.
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=9eQwWyblG_2b8ixLqbt6QFhg_3d_3d
We are hoping to get thousands of responses from people of all religions, ages, and regions of the United States and Canada. If you have any questions, feel free to e-mail Prof. Sarah Bunin Benor or Prof. Steven M. Cohen .
Sincerely,
Prof. Sarah Bunin Benor
Prof. Steven M. Cohen
Hebrew Union College – Jewish Institute of Religion
It really only does take a few moments of your time. The questions are interesting and might even make you think about how being Jewish affects the way in which you speak. Not to mention the fact that you will be providing important statistics to help these two scholars better understand linguistic trends among contemporary North American Jewry.
Haveil Havalim is live
Check it out here.
Ethical Quandary
Freedom of speech. A right guaranteed by the Bill of Rights. One in which I strongly support. For it is freedom of speech that encourages the free-flowing of ideas. Allows for blogging. Publishing any and all thoughts, ideas, convictions.
A society in which the exchange of differing principles is a healthy one. We certainly know what happens in culture that stifles such expression. The word ‘censorship’ stirs up dark memories of a recent past. I am convinced that people must have access to diverse voices. Even voices spewing hatred. At least in theory…
Yesterday, I was notified that I had a comment awaiting moderation. If it was just a person with an opposite point-of-view, there would be no question. In keeping with my belief about censorship, I would allow the comment without hesitation. For the first time, however, someone filled with violent loathing and representing biased lies has left a comment. Anti-Israel. Anti-Zionist. Anti-American. Anti-Semitic.
What to do? Do I allow the comment? By incorporating it into my blog, does that allow for other hate-filled liars to use MY BLOG as a platform with which to spread their false understanding of history?
Even if you do not normally take the time to comment here, I ask that you do this time. After all, it is my readers who will be affected by my choice.
The Power of Prayer
The practice of reciting Tehillim on behalf of one who is ill or is a captive dates back hundreds and hundreds of years. And yet this tradition presents a nagging question. Do we truly believe that God will only spare the life of one for whom others pray? What about those who have no one to intercede for them?
When life becomes unpredicable and scary, we fight to assert whatever control we can on the situation. Turning to God through our ancient texts as did our ancestors give us strength. And joining with others in a prayerful act of solidarity brings a great amount of power to a situation that otherwise feels overwhelming.
At 8:00am this morning, in the solitude of my garden, I recited this Psalm. But I was not alone. I was joined by hundreds and hundreds of Jews throughout the world who recited the very same Psalm at the very same time. Today coincides with the 29th of Sivan and marks the second anniversary of the kidnapping of Gilad Shalit. It has been two long years since he was taken. Kidnapped. Stolen. Two years since he has been home with his family. Two years since he was abducted for the crime of defending his country from terrorists.
Jews taken into captivity solely because they are Jews is nothing new. As long as we have lived among a hostile host majority, we have been vulnerable. In reaction to this reality, the obligation of redeeming the captive (pidyon sh’vuyim) has fallen upon the larger Jewish community. Certainly this obligation has played out in the state of Israel more than any other time or place. Over and over again, the State of Israel has stepped into dangerous situations in order to liberate Jews and bring them home to Eretz Yisrael. When mothers send their children to the army, it is with a heavy heart. Full of pride and fear. And the knowledge that should, God-forbid, the unthinkable happen, their son or daughter will not be abandoned on enemy soil. The sons and daughters of Israel will be redeemed and brought home, as it is written, “…and they shall come back from the land of the enemy … and your children shall return to their own border.” (Jeremiah 31:15-16)
Keyn y’hi ratzon – may this be God’s Will.
Put Down That Phone!
Yes. You.
In the Golden State, Vehicle Code (VC) §23123 goes into effect today mandating that cell phone calls are prohibited unless they are placed using a “hands-free” device. (A similar law went into effect in the Evergreen State today as well.)
A lot of buzz about this new law. And on the face of it, it makes sense. According to the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, “drivers using phones are four times as likely to get into crashes.” That statistic has been tossed around a lot. But just this morning, I heard the rest of story…
“The main finding of a fourfold increase in injury crash risk was consistent across groups of drivers,” says Dr. Anne McCartt, Institute vice president for research and an author of the study. “Male and female drivers experienced about the same increase in risk from using a phone. So did drivers older and younger than 30 and drivers using hand-held and hands-free phones.”
What did she just say??? No difference between using hand-held and that ridiculous-looking earpiece that makes the wearer resemble the Borg?
The results suggest that banning hand-held phone use won’t necessarily enhance safety if drivers simply switch to hands-free phones. Injury crash risk didn’t differ from one type of reported phone use to the other.
“This isn’t intuitive. You’d think using a hands-free phone would be less distracting, so it wouldn’t increase crash risk as much as using a hand-held phone. But we found that either phone type increased the risk,” McCartt says. “This could be because the so-called hands-free phones that are in common use today aren’t really hands-free. We didn’t have sufficient data to compare the different types of hands-free phones, such as those that are fully voice activated.”
Dr. McCartt was interviewed by Alex Cohen (one of my favourite journalists!) on Day-to-Day today where she clarified things. Apparently talking on the phone causes a “cognitive distraction.” It is the conversation that matters. Not the apparatus.
Cohen asked what the difference is between a phone conversation and carrying on a conversation with a passenger. Great question, I thought. Very weak answer. Dr. McCartt acknowledged that a conversation with a passenger could indeed be distracting but that a passenger could help with navigation or warn of an oncoming road block.
Listening to the radio? Not a problem, according to McCartt, as it is a far more passive activity. No response is expected and the listener is not engaged in the conversation.
She clearly hasn’t been in my car when a biased report on Israel comes over the airwaves ’cause there’s a whole lot of response from this listener.
Two Down…
Tonight was the second of ten tennis classes. I continue to be the WORST player in the class.
Let’s walk through this. Last week was the first class. Prior to that event, I had never held a racket in my hand. EVER. We “learned” how to hit the ball using a forehand shot. I actually did practice during the week but believe that the additional practice caused a slight amount of regression.
Class #2. Instructor hits balls to us and I am feeling pretty good. I hit most of them. They don’t all stay on the court. Some don’t even make it over the fence. But I make contact and, most importantly, use correct form.
Just when I am feeling a modicum of pride, we move on. Backhand. And that’s when things start to fall apart.
Not one. Not one ball did I manage to hit. Good try. You’ve almost got it. “This guy lies like a rug,” I think, “I haven’t hit one ball. What have I almost got?” I start to notice that he is sending more balls to the other students. Or am I just being touchy?
[In my defense, I am right-handed and my sub-dominant side is weak, weak, weak! Was a real problem when I played the piano. My left hand always lagged just a split second behind my right.]
My turn. Dave decides that hitting a ball to me is doing nothing to help the situation. So he walks right in front of me and gently tosses the ball in my general direction.
SMASH!
SMASH!
SMASH!
SMASH!
You read that correctly. Four balls. Four hits. I did it!
On my next turn, he steps back and hits them to me.
Damn! Not a one.
Dave then notices my problem (or should I say one of my problems). Just as the ball is about to make contact with my sweet spot, I do a little dip thing with the racquet.
{lightbulb}
Slight adjustment in my swing and…
SMASH!
SMASH!
SMASH!
SMASH!
A little insight goes a long way.
Feeling a bit more confidant…and then the game changes again. Now we need to alternate forehand and backhand.
Reminded me of college-level Hebrew. First class introduces the alef-bet and by the next class students are expected to sound out words.
And my favourite part? When he calls us “girls!”
She is THAT good…
The Ima just amazes me! She is like…but a better version :0 Take a look at the creative and seamless way she blended this week’s edition of Haveil Havalim and Jew camp.
Upcoming Target Return
In what must have been motivated by desired favourable decision in the handgun case, Beernut was given this as a birthday gift:
Today’s 5-4 decision understands the Second Amendment as protecting the right for individuals to own firearms. If it’s been a while since your last US Constitution class, let me remind you that the Second Amendment states that “a well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State and the right of the People to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.” Until this most recent decision, the right has been seen as a collective one. Today, the majority of the justices severed the rights of the individual from the rights of a militia.
I am not keen on the idea that any individual can walk around packing heat. Doesn’t make me feel comfortable and it certainly doesn’t make me feel safe. As a Jew, I find hunting inhumane and reprehensible. The idea of causing pain to an animal for sport goes against our teachings. As for self-defense, statistics support the idea that people are more likely to be injured when they attempt to take the law into their own hands. And the injured are not always the perpetrators.
The decision did not give carte blanche to gun owners. Felons are not permitted to own guns. Assault weapons and sawed-off shotguns remain illegal. But why did the Court strike down the trigger-lock requirement? I cannot begin to understand how the Second Amendment advocates have difficulty with a safety feature??
Guns kill. The cliche that “guns don’t kill, people kill” makes about as much sense as saying “nuclear warheads don’t kill, people kill.” The purpose of a gun is to harm. To maim. To kill.
“But it’s just a toy.” “It doesn’t even look real.” “Come on, it’s just a squirt gun.”
I’ve heard them all. And you know what? Too bad. It isn’t JUST a toy. And it doesn’t matter that it isn’t real. And a squirt gun is still mimicing a GUN. There is nothing fun about shooting someone.
And it’s my house and my kids. And we have should have the right to determine which toys are appropriate and which are not in keeping with our values.
Tennis anyone?
Come here, kids. Good shot. Good shot. Aw…bad shot. That’s OK. Keep it up. Good shot.
Over and over again, “Dave” comments on his students’ efforts. Positive reinforcement. It really goes a long way when working with students.
So there I was. The oldest person on the court.
There is nothing graceful about a zaftig, unathletic (non-athletic!) 37 year old chasing a fuzzy yellow ball.
Dave tries to be helpful by relating tennis to real life.
If you hit the ball at the top, it’s going to go straight down. Just simple physics.
While that might be true…probably is true…relating it to physics just doesn’t help me in the slightest. I never took physics.
I step up to the baseline and get into position.
Good one. That’s right. Don’t give up. Please don’t give up. 80% of people quit because they get so frustrated trying to hit that little fuzzy thing. You’re doing great.
If by “doing great” Dave meant that I hadn’t tripped over my own feet and ended up in the ER, then yes, I was in fact doing great. Trying to keep my hand at a 90-degree angle while trying to make contact with the ball WITHOUT getting smacked upside the head, falling, or hurting anyone took a tremendous amount of concentration and focus.
Think of the ball as a clock. 12 at the top, 3 on the right, 6 at the bottom, and 9 on the left. You want to hit the ball at about 6:45. It’s simple geometry.
“Simple” and “geometry” DO NOT belong in the same sentence. Dave’s attempts to make tennis relevant just weren’t working. As if the physics reference wasn’t bad enough, he then uses math. My WORST subject. And I took it twice.
Isn’t there some metaphor from the humanities that he could use??
Frume Sarah is Shabbos-observant -- in a Reform way, that is. Please note that from Friday afternoons until one hour after sundown on Saturday evenings, Frume Sarah will be unavailable, in observance of the Jewish Sabbath.
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