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Santa Assault

Wednesday, 24 December 2008

Sitting at lunch with a girlfriend today. Deep in conversation about the plight of Jewish 20/30-somethings. I saw him out of the corner of my eye. Huge red suit. White beard. He approached us and all I could think was “scary!”. I had never been so close to Santa before.

SC: Have I taken care of you girls?
FS: No, but it’s OK. We’re Jewish.
SC: Oh, that’s OK. Hanukkah Harry told me how much Jewish girls like to suck…candy canes. (Placing two on the table.). I’ll be sure to tell Hanukkah Harry the next time we have schnapps what nice Jewish girls you’ve been.

And with he drove out of sight…merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

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7 Comments leave one →
  1. Wednesday, 24 December 2008 9:46 pm

    I’ve heard that line on Jdate before. Scary world we live in.

  2. meira permalink
    Wednesday, 24 December 2008 10:18 pm

    Oy! Did this really happen?!?

    My child (fairly unprompted) developed an aversion to SC. While leaving day care on the day of another class party, SC (who was there for the party) saw us leaving and approached. I waved him off as my darling daughter backed away. We finally made it down the hall, as she declared, “Mommy I don’t like him. I DON’T LIKE HIM!!!” I said, “I don’t like Santa much either, honey, but it’s just a man in a costume, really you must be a bit nicer.”

    I hope none of the other kids heard that or I’ll be drummed out of town by their parents . . . .

    Oy.

  3. Thursday, 25 December 2008 12:11 am

    Yet another lesson proving why Jewish girls need to stay away from Santa?

  4. Thursday, 25 December 2008 7:54 am

    EWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    (one year one of my classmates dressed up as Santa for Purim. I thought it was hilarious and put David on his lap and took a pic. then I realized, what can I do with this picture!? this was way before blogging days so I think I would have had something to do with it. But then again, it might have offended….oy vey)

    okay, I’m back to ewwwww.

  5. Elisa permalink
    Thursday, 25 December 2008 9:03 am

    ewwwww…..!!!!!!

  6. knittnkitten permalink
    Friday, 26 December 2008 6:54 pm

    Squiko!

  7. Monday, 29 December 2008 2:06 pm

    Totally gross. I have to agree with Phyllis and Elisa in the most wholehearted way. Ewwwwwwwwww.

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