And So it Goes…
Dear Friends,
A story is told that before a child is born, his soul peers down from the Heavenly Abode and selects the parents that will be right for him. Having voiced his choice to the Holy One, Blessed be God, the soul is then dispatched to his eagerly awaiting parents.
It is a great responsibility, then, to live up to the expectations and needs of our children who, as this legend teaches, have chosen us because of the belief that we will be the best parents for them.
As many of you know, our son, Beernut, struggles every day with Asperger’s Syndrome. This developmental disorder affects every aspect of his life and, as he has gotten older, has presented an ever-growing list of challenges. It has become apparent to us and to his medical team that he requires far more support and attention from me than I am able to give while fulfilling my responsibilities to you.
Congregation Fill-in-the-Blank has been the lifelong spiritual home for me, for PC, and for our children. Here we have celebrated and mourned, rejoiced and been comforted. It is with sadness that we will leave at the conclusion of my contract, June 30, 2011, and resettle on the East Coast. Stepping down from congregational life will allow me to be the mother Beernut had selected more than a decade ago.
As always, I pray for the continued growth and strength of our shul.
Kol Tuv,
Rabbi FrumeSarah
How’s That Hill Looking Now?
A noisy group of teenagers lined the back of the sanctuary, holding balloons and signs. Though birthdays are regularly acknowledged at the monthly Family Shabbat Service, tonight was different. The rabbi was turning forty on this very day and the members of Orange Coast AZA and L’chaim BBG felt it deserved special attention.
We fancied ourselves rather sophisticated and clever. With our “Over the Hill” balloons.
Particularly funny as we all now stand on the precipice of forty.
But forty really did seem a long way off at the time. After all, we were only fifteen. Forty year olds seemed to have their lives together. Owned homes. Completed advanced degrees. Had children.
We were their children.
SO — happy sixty-fifth birthday, DadGiraffe. From your soon-to-be “Over the Hill” daughter.
Silly Rabbi
It happens on a near-daily basis. With house-key in hand, I fumble with the handle. Only to realize, once again, that my house-key will not open the door to my study. And on the very same day, the reverse happens. I chuckle every time as I find the correct key for the door. Especially given how radically the keys differ from one another.
I suppose the cynics among you will see this as a sign that I spend far too much time at work.
You know what I think?
My house and my shul are two halves of my home.
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Another busy week in the Jewish Blogosphere. The Rebbetzin’s Husband (what a great name!) takes on the mantle of hosting Haveil Havalim #291 – The Tribute to Stephen Harper Edition. And JPIX – The I Can’t Believe It’s Nearly Hanukkah Edition is up over at Around the Island.
Called to Serve
[This was published on motzei Shabbat]
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As I imagine many synagogues do, each November we honour those members who have given of themselves in service to the armed forces of the United States. We call them up and thank them for defending our freedom. Last night, BossGiraffe asked each individual to share name, branch, rank, file, and location of service. It was incredible. Men of all ages, who had served from 1938 through Operation Iraqi Freedom, spoke briefly about their assignments. Nearly two dozen of them. Who had seen action in the European and Pacific theatres, flown helicopters devoted to search-and-rescue/recovery over the Atlantic, traipsed the jungles in Vietnam, and kept us safe here at home.
These men. Many of whom are old. Really old. Bent with age. Yet, standing tall and proud as they recalled days long gone.
Look closely as they speak and you’ll catch a glimpse of the boys who once served.
“Thank you” is woefully inadequate.
Better Late than…
ONE HUNDRED FOUR
Rosh Chodesh Kislev
by Debbie Perlman, z”l
Abruptly, the darkness descends upon us.
Your Hand tilts the earth toward colder times
We scurry to close the day’s moments
As sun rays vanish before we are ready.
All the monts we rush about scrambling,
Trying to pack more in each day’s basket,
Fleeing the darkness
By filling the days with lightning steps.
Then, abruptly, Kislev
When our Mothers labored in tents
To birth the Nation Israel.
In their pangs they called upon Your Name.
Women’s voices calling:
Lean upon the Eternal
In the failing light, in pain and darkness.
Gather in new tents.
Move through darkness to the fire-lit places
To praise Your Name together.
Forboding
I smelled it as soon as I stepped outside the house this morning. And suddenly, I was four years old again. Watching flames lap at our neighbours’ house as someone (my mother?) held me, wrapped in a blanket, at a safe distance from the fire. Caused, if memory serves, by faulty electrical wiring.
A year or so later, another fire. This one caused by unattended Chanukah candles. An eerily familiar smell woke me that night, only to discover the living room table consumed by flames.
Thirty-five years have passed. But the hot dry winds carry with them the increased potential for wildfires. And make my hairs stand on end.
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Please check out my latest offering over at Smartly.
The Inconvenient Truth
There is nothing convenient about having a celebration in the middle of a weekday. People have work or in school. They have appointments, places to go, people to see.
And at eight days old every male shall be circumcised among you through your generations… Genesis 17:12
Not on the nearest weekend day. Nor on the next national holiday. It doesn’t say a thing about convenience. Short of any medical contraindication, the bris (ritual circumcision) is to be on the eighth day.
But Rabbi, my Great-Uncle Hymie is coming all the way from Florida and he says it’s cheaper if he has a Saturday night stay. I know that Sunday is really the eleventh day of life…but it would really be so much more convenient for everybody.
Here’s the thing; no one said that being Jewish was convenient. In fact, being Jewish is decidedly inconvenient much of the time. Trying to straddle the (sometimes) great divide between traditionalism and modernity requires flexibility, compromise, and commitment.
Even when it’s the middle of a weekday…
Lesser of Two Evils
Life in Beit Frummie is hectic. It has always been hectic, but this year, with PC’s new job (did I mention he has a new job?), things are especially hectic. And for the first time in a very long time, I arrived at the preschool without Peach’s carseat.
In the Golden State, a child must be secured in a child restraint system if s/he is six years of age or older, but less than 16 years of age, or who is less than six years of age and weighs 60 pounds or more.
[For the record, Peach is three-and-a-half years of age and weighs 38 pounds.]
Not long after our first [Beernut] started preschool, we learned that a two-car family needed two car seats. But even then, we often found ourselves playing musical car seats, whereby a seat must be transferred to whatever car will be transporting said child from Point A to Point B. Once-in-a-very-great-while, one of us (parent, grandparent, sitter, etc) would arrive for pick-up without the requisite seat. But that has never presented much of a problem as the school kept some extras in reserve for just such an occasion.
So imagine my dismay when I learned about a recent policy change at the preschool. It seems that the school has discontinued this helpful benefit due to liability. It seems that if a forgetful parent was to borrow one of their seats and get into an automobile accident, the school could be held liable.
So instead, parents are told to drive carefully.
While the parent is ultimately responsible, I would think that there is a better solution…
You Just Never Know
Some much of life involves “chance.” Luck-of-the-draw. Fate. Karma. Bashert. Call it what you will. I am constantly delighted in the intricacies of human interaction and the lifelong effects they can have.
On March 9, 1955, a scrawny nine-year old brought home a rented cornet from his elementary school, fulfilling a life-long dream to play the trumpet. Dismayed to discover that his all-knowing fourteen year old brother didn’t know the first thing about horn instruments, a phone call was placed to neighbour boy who played the oboe. This fella hopped on his bike and soon-thereafter, the nine-year-old was holding the horn and fingering it as though he had been playing it from birth.
The kid grew up to be Tony Horowitz. [He started out as Tony Horowitz, of course, but ended up being THE Tony Horowitz.]
The fourteen-year-old neighbour kid? My Uncle Bardley.
It was a behaviour he would continue throughout his life. Someone needed help or had a question [or had to construct a diorama for a seventh grade Medieval project], Uncle Bardley would hop in the car and lend a hand.
It’s amazing to consider how life might be different without those moments.
HH #290 — Falling Back Edition
Founded by Soccer Dad, Haveil Havalim is a carnival of Jewish blogs — a weekly collection of Jewish & Israeli blog highlights, tidbits and points of interest collected from blogs all around the world. It’s hosted by different bloggers each week and coordinated by Jack. The term ‘Haveil Havalim,’ which means “Vanity of Vanities,” is from Qoheleth, (Ecclesiastes) which was written by King Solomon. King Solomon built the Holy Temple in Jerusalem and later on got all bogged down in materialism and other ‘excesses’ and realized that it was nothing but ‘hevel,’ or in English, ‘vanity.’”
Much going on in the Jewish blogosphere this past week. Many of us continue to feel the loss of friend and teacher, RivkA Matitya, as you will see reflected in several posts.
RivkA
Risa speaks of RivkA’s innovativeness in What Women CAN Do!
Brian captures RivkA’s essence in The Eternal Optimist .
Things did not go as smoothly as they could and should have, according to Batya, in Funeral “Factory”.
Ricki’s Mom expresses her sadness in Thoughts on RivkA, Life and Death.
A Mother in Israel lets us in on her long and beautiful friendship in Memories of RivkA bat Yishaya, z”l.
A picture speaks a thousand words. Two thousand, then, from Around The Island (here and here).
Our Tradition encourages us to say Tehillim on behalf of those who are ill. West Bank Mama shares her Thoughts on Saying Tehillim.
Ruti-Mizrachi shares what she learned from RivkA.
And I talk about being counted.
Finally, a new initiative that will honour RivkA’s memory has been established.
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Torah
Talk about confluence! Yechezkel offers a very modern understanding of Yaakov and Eisav in Divergence from the Womb. [LOVE this!]
Threadz of Blue reminds us about Blessing the Children…as well as being a Blessing to them.
I continue to be amazed how much can be pulled out of text. Using Torah, Midrash, personal experience and her neshama, The Velveteen Rabbi shares Seven Miriam Stories.
A Simple Jew teaches us about humility.
Don’t be put off by PopChasid’s title, Art is Garbage (and So Are You). Stick with the post and you will see how we might understand our own souls through the nature of art.
And speaking of art, The Rebbetzin’s Husband shares one women’s artistic rendering of a very personal journey. Wow.
Wisdom is found in many places, as JanetheWriter writes in Kaddish d’Rabbanan: A Modern Interpretation.
Israel
Soccer Dad points us over to a true act of tzedek over at Six Kids and a Full Time Job.
Yoel Meltzer tells us why he thinks that Annexation is the only solution.
“When in Rome, do as the Romans” could apply in the case of Christian Hutzpah by Esser Agaroth, who also shares his Response to Hertz’s “No Occupied Territories”
Joel Katz helps us stay on top of Religion and State in Israel here and here.
Take a visit to the Hula Valley Nature Reserve with Creative Jewish Mom.
Ah, blessed rain. Precipitation arrives in the Homeland and Leah over at the Ingathering reminds us to be thankful.
If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then The Office ought to be extremely flattered now that Israel has its own version of the show. David interviews the star of the show and reports back on his meeting in The Big Man on Campus. (Thanks, Israelity for the link)
The global market means the world is literally at our fingertips. Don’t believe me? Check out the story about Abe’s Market. (Israelity sent in this one too!)
Acclimation happens in stages. The Three-Year Mizrachi Report lets us peak at one family’s process.
Maya remarks on the Inconsistency of Israeli Telephone Numbers to which Batya adds her take on it. Batya also wonders How Do You Solve A Problem Like Our Bibi?
From the groovy to the futuristic, Cosmic X in Jerusalem gives us the extremes.
Are you a leftist screwball? Here are the Top 10 Signs according to The Jewish Fist.
Judaism
Tikkun Olam is part of childrearing, says Marjorie.
No two journeys towards Judaism are identical. Here is Yaniv Ben David’s story, courtesy of Cosmic X in Jerusalem.
Are denominations good for the Jews or not so much? Friar Yid tells us in The Blame Game.
Truth, Praise, and Help presents us with the Bar Mitzvah invitation of the future…or is it present?
Just back from India, Rabbi Lemming shares his experience.
Kashrut
Kosher. Is it a black and white kind-of-thing…or is there a grey area? See what To Kiss a Mezzuzah has to say in The Sliding Scale of Kosher
Quick — check out Chavi’s post about Quick and Kosher and enter her giveaway that ends TONIGHT at 10:00pm. Still not convinced? Read this review over at In the Pink. [And major mazal tov to Hadassah for **finally** receiving her Green Card.
Culture
Good News, indeed! Jacob has some new Jewish video games for your edification.
So what about America’s Top MOdel?? Melissa (one of the Redefining Rebbetzins) offers her thoughts.
Leora interviews Ilana-Davita (whose posts and comments give tremendous insight into European life). What a great way to get to know a fellow blogger! Leora also reminds us that pictorial submissions are now being accepted for JPiX.
Personal
SO here is an example of one of the things I LOVE about my online relationships. My life is truly enriched by engaging in respectful discourse with people who hold differing opinions. Minnesota Mamaleh, when submitting her post on Halloween, wrote, “okay, lady. i know we don’t see eye-to-eye on this one. i hope it’s still okay though!…”. Galit, we sure don’t. But I appreciate hearing other points-of-view. Sects and the City weighs in as well.
Oy! The things people say. But The Ima takes it all in stride. [Doesn’t she look beautiful, puh X3?] And Leah? She makes a slideshow.
Ricki TRIED to Tell Me, says Ricki’s Mom, who also shares her disappointment in The Burst Bubble (or the Ups and Downs of Shopping). [BTW, yasher koach to Ricki’s Mom who has lost 44 kilo (97 pounds) so far. We are SOOOO proud of you!]
Published! That’s right. Shout-out to Elianah-Sharon for her beautiful article on the OU’s Shabbat page. [With a special mazal tov from Shira Salamone in Blogger Envy.]
To Kiss A Mezuzah reminds us not to wait for bad times to seek God’s Presence.
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For those of you living in places where there is a time change, take the opportunity to change the batteries in your smoke detectors. Welcome back to standard time.
And that concludes this week’s edition of Haveil Havalim. I hope that you enjoy reading these posts as much as I did!
Next week will be hosted by The Rebbetzin’s Husband. You may do so by using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.
Frume Sarah is Shabbos-observant -- in a Reform way, that is. Please note that from Friday afternoons until one hour after sundown on Saturday evenings, Frume Sarah will be unavailable, in observance of the Jewish Sabbath.
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