Kitniyot Follow-up
As promised, a report on Pesach 5770: Kitniyot or Bust.
Buoyed by the support I received in response to my dilemma regarding kitniyot, I announced to PC that I had decided to open up our food choices to include the consumption of kitniyot. Unbeknownst to me, PC had read my post, with all of the comments, and sensed a conversation in his future.
“Isn’t this a decision you and PC ought to have made together?” one might understandably ask. Reasonable question. After over fourteen years of marriage, you can be certain that I knew PC’s thoughts on the subject.
So the question of the hour. Did it make life easier to eat rice, legumes, corn and its byproducts, etc during Pesach?
Yes.
And no.
(I know…never a straight answer from this one.)
It certainly made for more plentiful menu options with the prohibited foods being limited to the five grains (wheat, oats, barely, spelt, and rye).
But it no longer felt like such a hardship. And while Passover is not intended to be an exercise in asceticim, there ought to be some sense of deprivation in order to have some understanding of our ancestors’ experience. Without the ban on kitniyot, it felt like a corn-filled free-for-all.
If corn is OK, what would be the reason for not eating corn tortillas? Regular chocolate? If rice is OK, are Rice Krispies forbidden? It felt as though Pesach was reduced to abstention from bread and pasta. Nothing more.
Pesach 5774. I am giving us until then to establish boundaries that are livable for the family and more comfortable for me. 5774. That is the first year Beernut will experience Pesach as a ritually-responsible adult. This gives us enough to time for trial-and-error as we find the right minhag for our entire family.
(And a special word of thanks to Edible Torah for writing about my internal struggle in the aptly titled post, Kid-niyot vs. Kitniyot.)
Doing the Right Thing
Today’s trip to the movie theatre was an expensive one.
$28.00 tickets (1 adult, 2 children)
$12.75 — water
$18.50 — snacks
But hey. I make it to the theatre about once a year. So while I’m not complaining, I did register my sticker shock on Twitter. Among the responses was this one:
I carry a big book bag n sneak drinks in. Justified since I am NOT paying 5x for a bottle of vitamin water! I do buy corn tho.
I read it. And I reread it. And then I started in, gently, with a bit of rabbinic rebuke. You see, it is against theatre policy to bring in outside food and drink. The fact that this individual is sneaking in the drinks is evidence that she knows what she is doing is wrong.
The prices are outrageous. And the theatre policy is self-serving. But no one is forcing you to shell out that kind of money. Because it is possible to watch a movie without eating and drinking. And, of course, no one is forcing you to go to the movies in the first place.
“What’s the big deal?” you ask? It’s stealing. It’s unethical. It’s immoral. Your kids are watching. And God is watching.
The net-net? The Twitter conversation ended with this:
My days of sneaking in vitamin water have ended.
And don’t get me started on sneaking into a second movie when only paying for one.
Out-of-Order
Just before Pesach, stories about another White House seder began flying around in the press and online world. I received at least two dozen links from well-meaning friends and family.
“Isn’t this wonderful?”
But, I wonder, what is so wonderful about a seder in the White House?
A little background.
Pesach 5668 on the Obama Campaign trail. Three low-level staff members were in Pennsylvania and suddenly found themselves unable to get home for the most widely-celebrated, and one of the most significant, Jewish festivals. Armed with a box of matzah and some Manischewitz wine (concord grape perhaps?), they cobbled together their best attempt of a seder with surprise guest, the candidate, in attendance. “Next year in the White House,” he added.
One year later, the seder was, in fact, held in the White House. And with that second seder, an annual tradition was born.
So what could send a stronger message that we Jews have actually arrived than a Passover seder in the White House?
Except…there isn’t a Jew in the White House.
- Issue #1: A Family-Focused Holiday
- Issue #2: Seder Leader
- Issue #3: A Jewish Holy Day
While on the campaign trail, the compacted schedule necissitated some improvisation for those Jews unable to return home for the chag. With the creation of an annual tradition, these very same folks may very well have the opportunity to spend these holy days with their family. But who in their right mind would turn down an invitation for an intimate dinner at the White House?
The seder leader is typically the head-of-the-household. In this case, the head-of-the-household is President Obama. Who isn’t Jewish. The Haggadah, which in this case was the Maxwell House Haggadah, is not merely a collection of readings. It is a sacred text. One that calls for elucidation. Commentary. Clarity. Most seder leaders highlight different aspects of the text each year and will often spend time wrestling with the text in preparation.
While it is true that we are called upon to make the ancient story new again by finding contemporary relevance, the concept hinges on the pronoun; we. We are commanded to relive our Exodus from bondage. This is our story. I do not take kindly to my holiday being reappropriated by others. (Just as I am troubled by the secularization of the holidays from other faith traditions as evidenced here, here, and here.) The White House seder made a contemporary exercise out of a sacred ritual, hallowed by the generations of my people.
Whenever I receive a flurry of emails that include a story such as the White House seder or the accomplishments of Jews, I sense a subconscious sentiment.
See? We’re OK. We really do belong.
The Journey Continues
Just hours past the end of Pesach, I still feel the excitement of reliving our journey from slavery to freedom. For the remaining forty-two days, we will make our way, slowly, tentatively, towards the Mountain.
Psalm 82: A Song of Praise for Pesach
Debbie Perlman, z”l
Hallelujah!
Praise the Eternal!
We praise You in the pause before the beginning,
The quiet glance and sigh
As we stand poised on the moment,
Filling our eyes with Your offer of freedom.
Hallelujah!
Praise the Eternal!
We praise You as we step forward together,
Hands held, heads raised, eyes focused
On the far distant dream of our redemption,
The place of Your vision for a holy people.
Hallelujah!
Praise the Eternal!
We praise You in the first short passage,
As the children run ahead and back,
Each striving to be the first to see
And call out the beauty of the Promise.
Hallelujah!
Praise the Eternal!
And let us praise You when our legs are weary
And the bundles and burdens are multiplied
By the time they have been on our backs,
Help us to praise You then.
For You, Eternal Deliverer,
Bring us all out of our enslavement.
You open our minds to the freedom
Contained within each of us.
You, Eternal Deliverer,
Call us to adorn our freedom with deeds,
To be released to a dedicated freedom,
Free to praise You with the work of our hearts.
Praise the Eternal!
Hallelujah!
Final Day
On today’s menu? Matzo-meal Pancakes to tide over the kids until we could eat our normal food options. Using Auntie Lena’s method of cooking. Which is to say, not much in the way of a formal recipe. Auntie Lena was one of my grandma’s shvesters. That’s how I’ve always thought of them. The shvesters. Of course, most of the shvesters were gone long before I arrived on the scene. Only Auntie Ester was still alive when I was young. I have some snippets of memory of Auntie Ester. I didn’t know she spoke English because by the time I knew her, she was a very old woman and had reverted to the Yiddish of her youth. Except that we didn’t know so much Yiddish. So she would translate. Into Russian.
Anyway, the “recipe” calls for some eggs, some milk, some matzo meal, and, if it’s on hand, matzo cake meal. In other words, you do it by feel.
The result? The little Frummies LOVED them. Beernut, who had declared a matzah strike earlier today, refused to try them and decided he’d rather just hold out until the holiday ended. Stubborn kid.
Around 3:45pm, Poppyseed had had enough.
I’m hungry for chametz!
“What about some refreshing applesauce or some lovely carrots dipped in some spinach dip?”
Nothin’ doin’.
“If it’s Kosher for Pesach,” she returned, “I’ll just wait. The only thing I am hungry for is chametz.”
Unexpected Stumbles
It’s the first Evite I’d sent since my Grandma died. So I didn’t realize that I had neglected to update my contact list. Until MomGiraffe informed me that I had inadvertently invited my dead grandmother to Peach’s party.
Life goes on. This year will be filled with firsts. Last week? The first seders without her. This week? Watching my mother attend Yizkor for the first time. Peach’s birthday party will be the first family celebration without her.
I guess that is what this first year is all about; feeling farblondget as we recalibrate to a new normal.
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Reminder: Frume Sarah will be off-grid until the completion of Pesach. According to God…that will be Monday night at 7:54pm.
Self-Censored Disclosure
For those of you who worry that every part of my life is fodder for the blog, a sermon, or bulletin article, fear not.
Boundaries. It’s all about maintaining boundaries. Though many experiences would make for entertaining reading, not every one ought not be shared.
‘Nuff said.
In other words, what you read here is just the tip of the Jew. (“Iceberg, Greenberg…what’s the difference.”)
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A huge shout-out to SuperRaizy for hosting Haveil Havalim during this past week.
Apparent Obfuscation
Really. This is what the saleswoman showed us when she sat us down to go over the proofs. Syl and I were unable to contain the laughter.
Saleswoman: This is just one example of what can be done with your picture.
FrumeSarah: I don’t think this is going to work for us.
SW: People just love getting these…and they come in packs of fifty.
FS: I’m sure they’re great. For Christian people.
Again, people, Easter is a religious holiday.
Which is why Poppyseed’s class had a “Peter Rabbit” party today. The school knows that they aren’t supposed to have an Easter party. But apparently the children’s life experience will be diminished without an egg hunt.
“A-ha! We can call it a Peter Rabbit party and perhaps no one will notice,” thought some well-intended parent.
Except…we noticed.
We had a Easter Egg hunt today, Mama. But they kept calling it a Peter Rabbit egg hunt. {{sigh}} Rabbits aren’t even oviparous.
Impressive use of your new vocabulary word, Poppyseed.
From Generation to Generation
Ten years ago, my grandmother, z”l, started a new Seder tradition; each person would sign the Haggadah he or she used at the Seder. To be more precise, it didn’t become a tradition until nine years ago. Whenever possible, a guest would receive the same Haggadah he or she used the prior year.
Now Grandma’s Haggadah passes into the hands of the next generation. She’d be so pleased.
Coming Attraction
Busy, busy, busy with last-minute Pesach prep. As if I don’t have enough to do…
FrumeSarah: Poppyseed, would you like to wear your black, shiny ballet flats to seder?
Poppyseed: There’s a problem, Mama. I can’t find one of them.
FS: That’s OK. You can wear your silver ballet flats.
PS: That’s a problem too. I can’t find one of those.
FS: Hey…you can wear one black and one silver.
PS: That won’t work. The black and the silver go on the same foot.
Tomorrow is a chag so no post. But I’ll be back on Wednesday. Which is not chag. At least, not according to the Torah.
Here are some upcoming topics:
- A seder in the White House. Any guesses as to what Frume Sarah thinks about that?
- Is it OK for the court to determine a child’s religion?
- More Easter shenanigans.
- and what did the Frummies decide to do about kitniyot.
Until then, a zisn Pesach to you and yours.
Frume Sarah is Shabbos-observant -- in a Reform way, that is. Please note that from Friday afternoons until one hour after sundown on Saturday evenings, Frume Sarah will be unavailable, in observance of the Jewish Sabbath.
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Thank you for your understanding...and gut Shabbos!!! 
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